Church Member / Attendee

Dear Church Member/Attendee,

The purpose of the following  information is to equip you with a source of processes and procedures for trauma-informed care. Our hope is that this collection of knowledge will allow you to navigate an incident of sexual abuse or inappropriate conduct within your church body in a healthy way. If you are clicking through this information, we know you have either decided to educate yourself on this issue or are in the midst of a crisis.

“The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.” Psalm 9:9 (NIV)

We pray you find strength in the God of the above verse as you traverse the next stages of dealing with an abuse allegation, and we pray that you are able to pass along the hope that comes in the verse with the survivors/victims of abuse whom you are ministering to.

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1

We understand you may be in a very troublesome situation as you navigate allegations that your trusted pastor/church leader may have sexually abused a church attendee, member, or possibly someone completely unknown to your church body. We appreciate the leadership you are displaying by ensuring that both those within and outside of your church remain safe and that your pastor/church leader is held accountable for his or her actions.

Before you read any further, we want to remind you that you are not alone. Our God is a just God and is with those who pursue justice; may His presence be your guiding light and peace. Also, despite the error of one church leader, there are likely other church leaders who will be able to assist you in the following processes. If you do not feel that is the case, you may personally reach out to your AMS/DOM (Associational Mission Strategist/Director of Missions) for assistance. In addition, in situations where it is appropriate to share, you have a church body who can surround you and everyone involved in prayer and support.

We pray you never need the information shared in these pages; however, if you do, these tools offer help and organization as you take your next steps. Managing difficult situations in a Biblical manner and maintaining respect for all souls involved is not always easy; however, it is important, and it is what we as Christians are called to do. Honesty and transparency are of the utmost importance in these situations (Matthew 18:15); may we gain brothers and sisters. 

The following information is broken down into written documents, videos, and links on various topics concerning sexual abuse and exploitation. The sections we would like to emphasize include: an “Immediate Response Checklist” and “Reference Guide” to be used in the event thatyour pastor/church leader has committed sexual abuse against a church member/attendee, and both Kansas and Nebraska “Resources”.  If you would like to access this information in entirety, simply click on the “All Information” button at the bottom of the page.

With love,

Church Forward

Immediate Response Checklist

Pastoral Counseling Policies & Procedures

It is recommended that churches adopt and follow a written counseling policy. Having a policy in place and requiring pastors to sign an agreement stating they will abide by that policy is a great first line of defense for both pastors and church members alike in the prevention of sexual abuse and sexual violence.

A policy enables:

● a pastor to be more readily prepared to handle any false allegations of improper conduct

● the church to limit liability and enable it to focus on ministry

A church that does not have guidelines in place for how a pastor conducts his counseling ministry could be found negligent of harm that a pastor commits during counseling sessions. If a church fails to take action after it has become aware, or should have become aware, of a pastor's misconduct during counseling, the church could also be liable for negligent retention of that pastor. 

Key elements in a pastoral counseling policy should hold a pastor providing services to:

  • Limit counseling to Biblical and spiritual concerns by rejecting the label of licensed, clinical, or professional counselor unless the pastor has actually received psychological training and licensing from an accredited institution;

  • Emphasize Biblical counseling by keeping the Bible open and clearly in sight throughout each counseling session, reading from at least one Scripture reference during the counseling session, assigning Scriptural homework to the person being counseled, and beginning and ending each counseling session with prayer (2 Timothy 3:16-17).

  • Encourage each person being counseled to sign a Counseling Agreement in which a pastor

    1) acknowledges the counseling provided is Biblical not professional

    2) acknowledges he is not a professional in psychological counseling, psychiatric therapy, or marriage and family counseling or therapy, and is not licensed by the state as a counselor, social worker or therapist (unless he does indeed hold a license)

    3) has the person being counseled agree not to sue the church for any expenses or damages that result from any of a pastor's counseling services as well as agreeing that otherwise confidential communications may be disclosed to appropriate state law enforcement authorities where required by law.

  • Never touch anyone in an inappropriate manner.

  • Take steps to ensure the confidentiality of counseling sessions. (Proverbs 20:19)

  • Keep detailed records of counseling sessions, (keeping careful records is necessary to protect pastors from a "he said, she said" dispute in a legal claim against a pastor or church; notes should be retained in a confidential file which no one but the counselor has access to (1 Corinthians 14:40);  including notes of the following: 

    • date, time and location,

    • names of those present and the reason for their presence,

    • confidential nature of the session,

    • problem for which counseling was sought,

    • spiritual advice given, including specific Scripture references shared,

    • specific actions recommended and any actions the counselee was discouraged from taking

    • any unusual incidents or statements occurring during the session, for example: 

    • threats of harm to self or others,

    • allegations of child abuse,

    • evidence that the counselee is under the influence of alcohol or a controlled substance;

  • Schedule all counseling sessions in writing and keep a secretary or other trusted church leader informed of a pastor’s whereabouts at all times during sessions;

  • Refer people with serious concerns or issues requiring professional counseling to a professional medical or psychiatric counselor with specialized training.

    • This policy not only ensures that a pastor reserves sufficient time for his other pastoral duties, but also lowers the risk of a pastor and counseled relationship becoming either intimate or estranged.*

  • Remove the temptation for impropriety and adultery while counseling members of the opposite sex by (1 Corinthians 6:18a)*:

    • Avoid counseling members of the opposite sex out of sight and alone,

    • Instead, make sure the counseling session is clearly visible to others. (Counseling in an open venue and/or in view of cameras can help eliminate the opportunity for emotional attachment and protect a pastor against unfounded allegations of misconduct.)

    • conduct the session in a room with a window,

    • conduct the session on a pew in the front of the church out of the hearing of anyone else, 

    • conduct the session in the presence of another staff person or trusted church member who was agreed upon by person being counseled; 

  • Never counsel a minor without the presence of another adult.

*One study of pastors involved in affairs found 71 percent of the affairs began through pastoral counseling sessions.

*Studies also show that many of those individuals counseled for an extended period of time leave the church because they feel exposed or feel like they have become the target of sermon illustrations. 

Referral to Other Professionals

Many church members/attendees are not trained in counseling and may experience feelings of uncertainty when approached with a need that exceeds their abilities. Despite taking on the role of a spiritual leader, church members/attendees do not have all the answers every person wants, needs, or asks for, and that is absolutely satisfactory; you simply cannot be everything to everyone. In fact, it is healthy to refer other church members/attendees to qualified professionals. In most circumstances, especially those that involve sexual abuse by a pastor or church leader, a referral to a licensed Christian counselor is warranted. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

The following are situational examples requiring referrals to other professional(s):

  • • Diagnosed medical conditions, such as: depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, etc.

    • Someone is a danger to themselves or others

    • Referral resources:

    • Christ First Counseling Services

    • Email address: cfcc@christfirstcounseling.com

    • Phone number: (888) 383-2322

    • The member’s or attendee’s regular counselor

    • A trusted Christian counselor in your area

    • If unsure of a local resource, your AMS/DOM may have some recommendations.

  • • When someone is thinking about or planning suicide

    • Referral resources:

    • Appropriate authorities

    • Call 911 immediately

    • Suicide and Crisis Lifeline

    • Phone number: 1-800-273-8255; 24 hours a day, 7 days a week

    • Text number: 988; 24 hours a day, 7 days a week

Have A Process

“The purpose of (a) process is to ensure consistency. A good process is like a checklist that ensures the right things get done by the right people at the right time.”
— Adrian Davis

Having a process helps prevent both biases and forgetfulness, and it fosters respect for everyone involved in a situation. 

In regards to both normal pastoral duties and those concerning sexual abuse, sexual exploitation, or sexual violence, it is necessary for pastors and church leaders to have processes-especially in the areas of reporting and documentation. Processes will help protect not only you as the pastor or church leader, but also your church body, if legal actions are ever taken against you or your church.  

In addition, it is vital that the church is well versed in the established processes so that everyone involved in the situation knows what to do. These processes or standard operating procedures means your organization does the same thing routinely in order to maintain safety and respect while avoiding bias toward the people involved in a given circumstance. These procedures also allow you to react swiftly in an organized manner and on a united front.  

Documentation for Pastors & Church Leaders

  • • Emails that track communication between yourself and others

    • Talk to text

    • Voice recordings (after first notifying other individuals in conversation)

  • • SOAP Notes (Subjective, Objective, Assessment, Plan)

    • Narrative notes

    • Voice recordings transferred to Word or an online document

  • • Time

    • Date

    • Place

    • Individuals present

    • Topic and content of discussion or situation

  • • Keep consistent notes that maintain the same format

    • Record notes as soon as you are finished with a conversation or during the conversation if able

Confidentiality vs. Secrecy

When the alleged offender is a pastor/church leader, there will be a time when the church as a whole will need to be informed. We recommend that you contact your local AMS/DOM for assistance in the best timeline and manner for sharing this information. Each church and community are different, and that should be taken into account when deciding when and how that information is shared. Remember we want to honor God above all, we want our actions and words to lead others back to Him, and truth in love is of the utmost importance when protecting and caring for all people.

Confidentiality means: “marked by intimacy or willingness to confide”

Appropriate confidentiality breeds health in a congregation. It fosters confidence in the leaders, trust within the flock, and encourages healthy behavior and accountability that builds people up and strengthens relationships. 

Please do not share another person’s information without permission from that individual. If the individual wants others to know, let them be the ones to share. When needed, inform the individual that you will consult with a trusted one or two other church leaders in order to seek wise counsel. Be careful when sharing information if you have a board, group of elders, deacons, and/or trustees; they do not ALL need ALL the details in every situation. Many times generalities are enough for your team to continue leading well. This also proves true in prayer requests. Remembering these recommendations will help your leadership team avoid gossip as well as limit the spread of gossip within your church body. (Proverbs 16:28)

  • • “Before you share this, I want you to know”

    • “I’m not going to promise that I won’t share.”

    • “Please trust me to do what is right.”

    • “I’ll communicate with you what I am doing as I am doing it.”

    • “I will share this information with someone else if you are a danger to yourself or others.”

Secrecy is defined as: “the condition of being hidden or concealed”; “the habit or practice of keeping secrets or maintaining concealment”

Secrecy fosters fear, anxiety, mistrust, gossip, and dysfunction in the flock. It destroys accountability and gives space for untruths which can produce much collateral damage. Secrecy can affect church growth. It can hamper the congregation’s ability to come before God and allow the Spirit to move in the midst of the faith community. This can be especially true when pastors or church leaders have used or continue to use secrecy in attempts to preserve reputations or in order to control individual views within the church body. (Mark 4:22)

“Secrecy, once accepted, becomes an addiction.” -Edward Teller

By taking steps to guard confidentiality while preventing secrecy that can harm the church body as a whole, you are protecting the very children of God. May we allow the light of Christ to shine in our communications and dealings with one another.

Key Words

  • for this task force, an individual who is accused of sexual abuse, sexual assault, or sexual violence

  • a set of rules that members of an organization or people with a particular job or position must follow

  • anyone who holds a state recognized license in Kansas; for the purposes of this task force, pastors are mandated reporters; ethically and morally, pastors should report instances of sexual abuse, sexual exploitation, and sexual violence

  • everyone; everyone has a responsibility to report child abuse or neglect; state law requires any person who has a reason to believe that a child has been abused or neglected to report their concerns to the Child Abuse and Neglect Hotline

Trauma-Informed Care

Trauma-informed care is vital to the healing of individuals who have been abused. Being trauma-informed means first realizing the prevalence of trauma and second realizing that everyone has different reactions to trauma; at its simplest form, this means that people’s actions can be influenced by their traumatic experiences. There is not a “one size fits all” response to a traumatic event. Some individuals react to trauma in maladaptive ways and even develop mental health disorders in response to their experience, while some individuals react to trauma more positively.

Important principles of trauma-informed care include:

  • • It is important for you as a pastor or church leader to believe the survivor who is approaching you for assistance

    • Coming forward to seek help can be extremely difficult and even daunting for the survivor

    • It is not your job, as a pastor or church leader, to substantiate or disprove the claims that are being made

  • • You are encouraged to ask for permission prior to

    1) becoming involved in the survivor’s healing process

    2) setting up a meeting with another trusted church leader who can become involved in the survivor’s healing process

    3) discussing certain topics with the survivor

  • • When an individual has been through sexual trauma, their voice, certain choices, and bodily autonomy have been taken from them

    • It is important for you to offer the survivor one of the biggest keys to healing: control

    • Asking questions is one of the main ways you can offer control

    • Allowing them to be in the “driver’s seat” especially regarding next steps in seeking justice and obtaining healing is another main way you can offer control

  • • This will depend upon the age of the survivor

Mandated Reporting for Kansas & Nebraska

Currently, anyone holding a professional license in the state of Kansas is a mandated reporter. Pastors, you are not mandated reporters; however, mandated or not, reporting is the right thing to do. 

  • Mandated reporter state definition: any person who is licensed to practice any branch of the healing arts, a licensed psychologist, a licensed master level psychologist, a licensed clinical psychotherapist, the chief administrative officer of a medical care facility, a teacher, a licensed social worker, a licensed professional nurse, a licensed practical nurse, a licensed dentist, a licensed marriage and family therapist, a licensed clinical marriage and family therapist, licensed professional counselor, licensed clinical professional counselor, registered alcohol and drug abuse counselor, a law enforcement officer, a case manager, a rehabilitation counselor, a bank trust officer or any other officers of financial institutions, a legal representative, a governmental assistance provider, an owner or operator of a residential care facility, and independent living counselor and the chief administrative officer of a licensed home health agency, the chief administrative officer of an adult family home and the chief administrative officer of a provider of community services and affiliates thereof operated or funded by the department for children and families or licensed under K.S.A. 75-3307b and amendments thereto who has reasonable cause to believe that an adult or child is being or has been abused, neglected or exploited or is in need of protective services shall report, immediately from receipt of the information, such information or cause a report of such information to be made in any reasonable manner.

    A report should be made by the person who has “a reason to believe” that abuse or neglect is being experienced; however, if you are aware that someone else is making a report, you are not then required to report-as long as a report on the child’s or vulnerable adult’s behalf is made. Follow-up is key in these situations to ensure that at least one report is made.

    Generally, a report is not required for an adult who has experienced sexual abuse in their childhood UNLESS there is “reasonable suspicion” that the alleged offender is still alone around children/vulnerable adults or UNLESS the person the report is made to is a mandated reporter. Though the law seems unclear in regard to adults who recount abuse that occurred in their childhood, those with a designated state license who receive an account of the sexual abuse are encouraged to report. The ultimate goal for pastors and church leaders who have knowledge of a potential danger is to stop the cycle of abuse.

    **When in doubt, REPORT.

    If you are unsure how to make a report, we encourage you to review the information in the following websites:

    Reporting Abuse, Neglect and Exploitation of Adult and Child - Prevention and Protection Services

    A Guide to Reporting Child Abuse and Neglect

    If you continue to experience uncertainty, you may email Christ First Christian Counseling at survivorsfirst@christfirstcounseling.com with questions you have pertaining to reporting.

    Anyone who reports is treated much like a person under Good Samaritan Laws which prohibit actions against the Good Samaritan or, in this case, reporter:

    “Anyone who, without malice, participates in making a report to DCF or a law enforcement agency on suspicion that a child may be in need of care, or anyone who participates in any activity or investigation relating to the report, or anyone who participates in any judicial proceeding resulting from the report, shall have immunity from any civil liability that might otherwise be incurred or imposed.”

Currently, everyone in the state of Nebraska is a mandated reporter. Pastors, church leaders, volunteers, and flock, this means you are responsible for reporting any allegations recounted to you.

  • Mandated reporter state definition: everyone has a responsibility to report child abuse or neglect; state law requires any person who has a reason to believe that a child (or vulnerable adult) has been abused or neglected to report their concerns to the Child Abuse and Neglect Hotline

    Everyone is not specifically defined throughout the Nebraska Statute of Limitations. There is no distinction made between child and adult.

    A report should be made by the person who has “a reason to believe” that abuse or neglect is being experienced; however, if you are aware that someone else is making a report, you are not then required to report-as long as a report on the child’s or vulnerable adult’s behalf is made. Follow-up is key in these situations to ensure that at least one report is made.

    Generally, a report is not required for an adult who has experienced sexual abuse in their childhood UNLESS there is “reasonable suspicion” that the alleged offender is still alone around children/vulnerable adults or UNLESS the person the report is made to is a mandated reporter. Though the law seems unclear in regard to adults who recount abuse that occurred in their childhood, all persons in Nebraska who receive an account of the sexual abuse are encouraged to report. The ultimate goal for pastors and church leaders who have knowledge of a potential danger is to stop the cycle of abuse.

    **When in doubt, REPORT.

    If you are unsure how to make a report, we encourage you to review the information in the following websites:

    Child Abuse

    What to Expect - Project Harmony

    If you continue to experience uncertainty, you may email Christ First Christian Counseling at survivorsfirst@christfirstcounseling.com with questions you have pertaining to reporting.

    Anyone who reports is treated much like a person under Good Samaritan Laws which prohibit actions against the Good Samaritan or, in this case, reporter:

    “Your contact with the hotline is confidential and will not be shared with the family. You may be contacted by a Child and Family Services Specialist during the investigation, however, you may request to remain anonymous.”

    For more information, please reach out to DHHS at DHHS.ChildrenandFamilyServices@nebraska.gov

Statute of Limitations

  • Rape: No time limit to report

    Sexually violent crimes: Depends upon the age of the survivor

    • For survivors 18 years or older case must be started within 10 years of the crime

    • For survivors under 18 years old, within 10 years of their 18th birthday

    EXCEPTIONS:

    • If you are absent from the state or hiding within the state.

    • The crime has been concealed.

    • Substantial evidence that two of the following factors exist: survivor was under 15 when the crime happened, they did not understand the acts were a crime due to age/intelligence; survivor was prevented by a parent or other legal authority from telling the police about the crime; an expert witness testifies that the survivor has repressed memories about the crime

    A case starts for the purposes of the statute of limitations when a complaint or information has been filed or an indictment by grand jury returned and a warrant has been issued. However, if the warrant isn't executed, the prosecution isn't deemed to have started.

  • Under Nebraska law, the statute of limitation depends upon the severity of the crime, ranging from one year to no time limit.

    • First or second degree sexual assault: No time limit to report

    • Sexual assault (second or third degree) when the victim is 14 or younger, third-degree sexual assault when the victim is under 16 when the assault happened, incest, sex trafficking, labor trafficking, or child pornography: No time limit to report

    • Kidnapping, false imprisonment, child abuse, pandering (activities involving prostitution), debauching a child under 17 (that is exposing or involving the child in sexual activities), obscene materials when victim is under 16: 7 years after the offense was committed or the child turns 16, whichever is later

    • Failure to report child abuse or neglect: 18 months after the offense was committed or the child turns 18, whichever is later

    *Even if prosecution is no longer applicable, it is still important to report in order to pursue healing and closure and to protect others from sexual abuse.

    https://nebraskalegislature.gov/laws/statutes.php?statute=29-110

Christ First Counseling Center (CFCC) Services for Pastors

Christ First Counseling Center (CFCC) is “dedicated to strengthening individuals, couples, families, and communities.”

CFCC is “a non-profit ministry that seeks to serve those around us with the highest level of care possible. We strive to be a compassionate ministry of hope and healing for all people; and to contribute to the overall health and well-being of the community we work and live in by providing the best care to every client through Christ-centered, integrated clinical practice, education and research. We also specialize in Human Systems Consulting, organizational health, and training services.”

This “means you can come to us no matter your situation and we will work with you. We will work with you to provide you with high quality services at an affordable rate. We desire to walk through your situation with you. It also means that to continue what we do, we rely on donations to assist those who need support but can not afford it.”

Pastors/church leaders, we encourage you to receive the care you need in order to lead a healthy family both within your home and within your church. We also encourage you to seek assistance when the weight of counseling another becomes too much to bear. Your needs are important to us at Church Forward/KNCSB. Therefore, Church Forward/KNCSB contracts with and allocates funding to Christ First Counseling Center. CFCC provides counseling in person and via telemedicine in both Kansas and Nebraska. If you feel you are in need of their services, you may contact your local AMS/DOM, one of your Church Forward/KNCSB convention staff, or CFCC directly. When you initially speak with the counseling office, be sure to mention you are a Church Forward/KNCSB pastor and request a referral form.

While CFCC does accept many forms of insurance, including Medicare and Medicaid, and works with individuals based off of a sliding scale, we understand that not all insurances cover mental health resources and that even a sliding scale may not make counseling feasible in your situation. If seeking counseling services would or could create a financial burden on your family, Church Forward’s partnership with CFCC may be able to provide assistance. Let your AMS/DOM, the Church Forward/KNCSB convention staff member, or the CFCC representative you speak with know that you would benefit from financial assistance in order to receive counseling services.

Additional Resources